ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you.
It's not proud. It's given up. Even the bird has moved on.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your thirties are your twenties with consequences. The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports…
- Your thirties are your twenties with consequences. The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
- Don't settle. Your standards already have. They didn't tell you.
- They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands. It will be the…
- You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move. Your audience is very…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
One quote. Every morning. Delivered before coffee, when you are weakest and the day has not yet had the chance to disappoint you itself.
No spam. Just disappointment. Unsubscribe whenever you regain hope.