ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your 5am routine went viral.
You did it once, filmed it, and have slept until 11 every day since. The algorithm doesn't know. Your landlord does.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your friends' group chat went quiet. It didn't. They made a new one. Same…
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- You don't have a type. You have a pattern. Your friends have a group…
- You "don't believe in labels". You believe in being kept as an option.
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- Your thirties are your twenties with consequences. The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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